Tuesday, June 2

night awakenings

A few times a month I wake up in the middle of the night to a tap on the shoulder and a "mom, can I sleep in here?" I really try my hardest to be sympathetic, maybe she's had a bad dream, but more than likely she needs to use the bathroom and hasn't quite figured out that's what woke her up. But some nights, especially if I'm woken up 3 minutes after falling asleep, I cannot muster up any sympathy. None. Still, I try to not be too mean while sending her back to bed. But this is Alexis we're talking about--she doesn't do anything without first pushing her limits. Which means of course she doesn't go back to bed easily.

Last night was one such night, and when the episode was over (or so I thought) I told Jeremy, "By the way, we're bad parents".

So my question: Are we bad parents because we are not sympathetic when they wake up in the middle of the night? Actually, don't answer that. Just tell me if you are the same way, or how you manage to muster up the loving sympathy for your child in the middle of the night.

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And here's something that makes me laugh. For awhile Alexis was in the habit of saying "How DARE YOU mom!" whenever I did something that bothered her. She doesn't say it anymore, but Tyler does. Except it comes out as "DARE YOU MOM!!" and it's not always used in the right context. It makes me laugh every single time.

9 comments:

Shelise said...

Dallin wakes up fairly often as well. But, he doesn't come upstairs into our room. He just cries in his room until we come in. And then when I figure out that everything is alright (and I am usually somewhat sympathetic) then I tell him in a very stern voice "no more crying". Sometimes he asks why, but usually it works. Sometimes he cries cause he has lost his Lightning McQueen Pillow, sometimes his feet hurt, but sometimes it is cause he fell off the bed, and if you have seen his room at night, it is pitch dark in there, you can't see a thing. But anyway, I think you are a great Mom and I wouldn't worry about what you are doing. Alexis tends to make everything seem much worse than it is. If you ignore it and don't let her win, then... well... you WIN!

Karly said...

I LOVE the "DARE you mom!" from Tyler. I laugh out loud just picturing it.
I think you're one of the best moms I know. (And I know a lot!) Hang in there. I'm sorry no advice - I'm usually full of advice I know. But I don't profess to know things about parenting until I actually have kids of my own. :)

~Jeneece said...

I'm a mean mom like that too. Only when they are teeny (like Kiya) are they allowed in the bed with us. Once they are old enough though if they come in I have always taken them right back into their room/bed. In all fairness, I have fallen asleep on their beds to help calm them. I think the only time that you really need to make sure that they are alright is with night terrors or growing pains and then it's just what works for them and you. But I got your back sista! Mean mommies, unite!

Jessica Munk said...

I am exactly the same way! If I am feeling particularly bad about my recent parenting. I pray for more patience and compassion, and it works-til I stop paying attention and asking for the help. :P

Lindsey said...

Mommy and Daddy's bed is Mommy and Daddy's bed in our house. C slept with us once and it was the worst night sleep of my life. And then I'm crabby the next day making me an even worse mom. The other night I pretty much yelled at Charlie for getting up a 3rd time. (Andy told me I need to be more patient.) And you do feel like crap after, but sleepy time is precious.---As a side note, I have a friend who let her kids sleep with them a few times and now all three kids sleep in their bed. NEVER! Plus, how do you have...ya know...secky pecky time? Ya, they don't. Just something to think about.

Reynolds Family said...

I would react EXACTLY the same way. I think you are a better mom for handling it that way. And you are probably both happier in the morning.

Love the, "DARE you mom!" Made me laugh! Thanks!

pfabulouspfun-der said...

Some how I have trained my kids to want Brandon at night. I sleep closest to the door and they will walk around and wake up Brandon. We are mean parents for sure. No kids in my bed... I just have Brandon go sleep with them!:)

pfabulouspfun-der said...

Some how I have trained my kids to want Brandon at night. I sleep closest to the door and they will walk around and wake up Brandon. We are mean parents for sure. No kids in my bed... I just have Brandon go sleep with them!:)

Kevin said...

It's amazing how frustrated I can get with my kids yet still love them at the same time. Very weird emotions happen to parents. I don't know if I trust anyone who hasn't snapped at their kids before.