1. Invite three guests. Only have two actually show up.
2. Hang up streamers. Make sure half of them fall down before the party even starts, leaving them for the birthday person to fix.
3. Put the four year old in charge of making the birthday hat.
4. Wrap the presents with Christmas wrapping paper.
5. Cram all 30 candles on one average sized cupcake.
6. Wrap up things that are actually for the kids. Then when they "give" the kids "their" gifts, they lock in the coolest dad/mom status. (thanks mom!)
7. Make sure you don't give them gifts they actually want, or clothes that fit. That way they can return every gift they got.
I hope these tips help you when planning a birthday party in the future!
If you don't hear from me for a week it's because I'll be too busy wandering around Yellowstone looking for a bear that will let me stick my head in it's mouth. Like the circus trick, except not with a trained animal and without any practice, I'm sure it's more thrilling that way.